Published on March 27th, 2013 | by Peggy0
What’s Your Story?
Read all the parenting books you want, nothing, and I mean nothing, will ever truly prepare you for the dreaded “sex talk” with your child. I think part of the reason it’s so daunting is because it’s so important to get it right.
Generations before us preached the whole “don’t have sex before marriage”, “if you’re gay you’re going to hell”, “birth control is against God’s way”, “using a tampon will rob you of your virginity”. The ridiculous list of inaccuracies goes on and on. Don’t get me wrong, not all parents provided bad information…some didn’t provide any at all.
Fast forward to today, many of us think we’re in tune with the times and thinking we’d never screw it up like those parents of past years. We discuss sex with our children, we’re open minded and hip. We encourage them to be honest, to come to us because our door is always open. We got this…no worries.
We don’t “got this”. We’re raising a generation of adults that treat sex like currency. The mystery and importance of sharing something so intimate with another person has been eroded to a point that it’s meaningless. No wonder it leaves many feeling empty and wanting. Flitting from partner to partner, never really digging in and doing the work does not provide much genuine “pleasure” no matter what you tell yourself in delusion.
Women don’t know what it means to be a lady…men are rarely gentlemen. It’s not being liberal, it’s sad. We’re a generation of excess but quite possibly the most morally bankrupt, ever.
We parents need to start teaching our kids that sex is to be treated with an element of respect. That it’s ok to say no or to wait until the moment is right for the both of you. That your own pleasure is as important as the other person’s and that it’s ok to ask for what you need, not just give the other what they want. And that it’s not ok to exchange sex for stuff or money. So if your kids are not comfortable talking about sex chances are they’re not ready to shed their clothes either.
One of our family mottoes is, “What do you want your story to be?” Such a simple statement has carried us through some pretty complicated and trying issues. It has enabled all of us to gain that bit of perspective needed before making a decision. “What would “me” in 10 years think of this decision I’m about to make now?” Sometimes when the kids and I talk about important stuff, like sex, we’ll often revert back to this. It has proven quite helpful.
So I ask you…What do you want your story to be?